LOOP Blog

In my last post, I mentioned the isolation I felt after diagnosis. I kept my disease and my emotions private. At the time, I didn’t think this was my choice. I felt bullied into silence by my disease. It was so embarrassing. If I had to be sick, why couldn’t I have a normal disease? I thought everyone on the Internet was a weirdo (who would be crazy enough to admit they had IBD online!?) and just wished there was someone nearby who knew UC stood for more than “you see.” I didn’t only feel alone, I was so remarkably confident that I was alone. In retrospect, I wasn’t really trying. I didn’t consider Camp Oasis, or as I preferred to mockingly call it, Camp Whiny Sick Kid (stop, don't listen to my bitter little self, not at all accurate!). I wouldn’t have admitted it, but I knew there were support groups out there. It was my choice not to look into them.

In 2010, I was a Junior in high school, getting over my second flare. I was still as stubborn as my immune system. I wouldn’t have mentioned my disease at school in a million years. When Crohn’s disease came up in French class, it wasn’t from my lips - which made it all the more surprising!

It turns out that all along, a boy just a year older than myself at school had Crohn’s. His family was very active in the IBD community actually. I just never opened my eyes wide enough to realize. I passed him in the hallway at least twice a day. I didn’t speak up that day, though I could see my teacher who knew about my IBD eyeing me from her desk. I wasn’t ready, but this was a defining moment for me. I couldn’t believe it! I ran through the "what if’s" in my mind. How could I have missed this in a school of only 400 students? Would the past two years have sucked less if I had spoken out and connected with him?

Here’s what’s even more surprising, though: I still didn’t reach out to him. Just a few months ago, he reached out to me on Facebook, and I pretended I hadn’t known. I didn’t make the first move. Why?

Taking the first step is scary. Admitting to others that you have a disease is difficult because it forces you to admit your disease to yourself. I ran for two years - because I was scared of a label. I didn’t realize yet that I could choose my label. By not coming to terms with my disease, I was letting it label me - as a girl controlled by her disease. Now, I label my disease - as something that may challenge but will not trap me again.

Now that I’m actively involved in the IBD community, I love meeting other teens with UC and Crohn’s. I love sharing experiences, and I love how we often inspire each other. I wish I hadn’t waited so long to take that first step.

That first step is scary, but believe me, it’s not nearly as scary as fighting IBD alone.

Open your eyes. Look around you. Someone to understand how you feel might be closer than you think. You won’t know until you try.

Remember Alex? Read Alex's first post to LOOP here.

My life in one word (or acronym)…. IBD. I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease at age nine. I am currently a sophomore at Milford High School and 16 years old. My life with Crohn’s disease was summed up one day by my school nurse. That day I came in to the nurse’s office and I broke down. I was in the middle of a month or so – what seemed like an endless period of having stomach cramps for no apparent reason. I started crying and in that conversation the nurse had this to say about IBD, “You’re allowed to say it sucks.” I thought that summed up the low points of my life and other patients’ lives with Crohn’s disease pretty well.

In my seven years with Crohn’s, I have gone through all the medications used to treat kids and have not found one that works. I have had several surgeries, the biggest of which was a resection of my ilium this past August. I have definitely had my ups and downs. But doesn’t everybody?

Even through the lowest downs, there is always an up; the silver lining that lights up your day. For me, I found that silver lining through Crohn’s disease. I guess Kelly Clarkson doesn’t lie when she says “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” My silver lining is advocacy for a better patient experience. I get my inspiration, my optimism and my might from the patients that I see who have thrived under the weight of diseases worse than mine.

Crohn’s has turned into my life and my strength. It is the reason I am down, but it is also the reason I get right back up again. I have made new friends from Crohn’s. Through Crohn’s disease, I have learned who I can count on, to support me when I fall. It has introduced me to some of the most wonderful patients and people I will ever know. I have met patients facing bigger obstacles than me and living their lives giving back to others; living like everyday could be their last. Through Crohn’s disease, I have found my future and my life goal.

Life will always be full of obstacles but the way you deal with them is what determines whether the roadblock will be turned to a strength or a weakness.

Crohn’s is my life and my strength.

On June 19^th, I was honored to represent the ImproveCareNow network and other learning networks at a White House meeting on how Health Information Technology (health IT or HIT) can improve health outcomes.

Present were about 75 leaders from institutions and practices that have advanced the use of health IT to improve care and outcomes.  In his opening remarks, Farzad Mostashari, MD, Director of the Office of the National Coordinator for Health (ONC) IT made a number of important points:

• The number of offices using electronic medical records (EMRs) has doubled and about half (2,400) hospitals in the US now have EMRs

• Increasing the use of health IT faces many challenges: workforce training, data sharing, privacy and security.  The opportunity is to move beyond simply implementing new technology to using health IT to improve care and outcomes.  ONC is particularly interested in how to turn data collection through electronic health records into a quality improvement program and so invited groups like ours.

• What’s unique about HIT is how fast it can adapt and change in response to needs and feedback

• And it’s important to harness the knowledge within the field.  For me, this was the most important message of the day and one that’s right in line with what we’re doing in the ImproveCareNow Network and C3N Project.  It’s our responsibility to share the knowledge of all – patients, clinicians, and researchers to make health care better.  If patients and clinicians don’t speak up and share what they know, patients will suffer by not getting the best care

During the conference participants shared numerous examples of how HIT and the Affordable Care Act are working to make care better, more efficient and cheaper

• HIT helps to engage patients in collaboration in addressing their problems.  “You use it in collaboration with patients to guide their care.” Mike Zeroukian, MD

• Charles Kennedy, MD Aetna.  “We will increasingly see health insurers pay for health information exchange and better use of data.”

Participants also noted the many limitations of current technologies including:

• Ways for patients to share information among providers

• The need for greater public awareness about individual vendors’ willingness and action in making data sharing possible across systems

• The need for public usability ratings for EMRs (like Consumer Reports) to spawn greater competition in meeting the needs of practicing clinicians

• The need for EMR vendors need to learn about how to support QI

Overall, it was clear that administration officials were listening and that much excellent work is taking place in the field.  It’s a pleasure to be able to represent the work of ImproveCareNow and the C3N Project, which is one of several data and knowledge sharing networks for kids with chronic illness.  Networks such as ours will be the way of the HIT future.

It first occurred to me while organizing the Big Blue Box, a jumbled collection of boxes, bottles, and doctors’ notes. A friend walked into my dorm room as I transferred that week’s supply of pills into my backpack. She already understood the basics of IBD, but I took the opportunity to introduce her to my crew of prescription superheroes.

I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis in 2008 at fourteen. It took just one month. I got lucky. I woke up from my first set of scopes to find out I’d won a ride to the inpatient floor. I was told to expect at least a week-long sleepover. Instead, my body ate up the Prednisone like candy, and I managed to break out after three days. Lucky for the second time.

My first superhero was Asacol. It gave me a sweet two months of remission. I flared again in 2009. This was my worst IBD flare to date, no doubt, but again I got lucky. I avoided an inpatient stay. I responded to Prednisone again. The rash on my skin that threatened to take my beloved Asacol away turned out to be a benign condition. I won’t deny the facts: the pain was unbearable at times, I felt very isolated in school, and I re-flared halfway through my Prednisone taper. I still think myself lucky.

I met a new superhero: 6mp. My parents and I feared it at first. It had the dreaded C word attached to its reputation. It came with an abundance of blood tests and risks. It also saved my colon. I’ve had very few side effects, and none of them significant. I expected nausea or worse to come out and, bam, hit me in the face, but they didn’t. Remission finally stuck around. I’ve had no significant disease activity since 2009.

Through it all, IBD was my secret. Poop isn’t really a comfortable topic of conversation in high school. I hated how my disease had affected my high school social life. I decided I needed to reach an emotional remission to match my physical remission: I would control how my disease affected my life, not vice versa. I joined an online support group. I’ve met and bonded with other teens with IBD. I’m a member of the ImproveCareNow patient advisory council. This year, I’ll be a volunteer counselor at CCFA Camp Oasis. I’ve found my voice, or at least I’m trying.

I have friends without colons. I have friends that dream of remission. I have friends that have dietary restrictions I don’t have or feeding tubes. I don’t pity them, but I do consider myself lucky. Every patient’s story is different, and none of us chose our story ahead of time. We didn’t get to preview our particular path through the disease and approve or veto it. I don’t know why my path has been less bumpy than my friends’. It makes me sad. If I could, I would share my remission with them. I can’t explain why things are the way they are, so I just call myself lucky.

That day in my dorm room with the Big Blue Box, all of this ran through my mind.

“This just makes me feel so bad for you,” she said finally.

The story rushed through my head from the beginning - where I started, how far I’ve come. My story is my own, but my passion for sharing it is about so much more than me. Neither of us spoke for a few seconds.

“I’m okay,” I say. It’s true. I’ve been lucky.

Optimism is a wonderful thing that the world needs to have more of. Dictionary.com defines optimism as “a disposition or tendency to look on the more favorable side of events or conditions and to expect the most favorable outcome” or “the belief that good ultimately predominates over evil in the world.” Optimism is what pulls a person through adversity; gives a person hope; and makes patients heroes that serve as role models for other patients.

My six-year experience with Crohn’s Disease has included the bottom up approach in finding medications and without all that much success; hospitalizations; resection surgeries; alternative ways of finding nutrition, and lots of pain. Some may think that it’s hard to be optimistic with all of this, but I have two choices.  I guess I could wallow in self-pity or face it head on, and try to stay optimistic.  The latter is my choice; I think a better path to follow and it sure makes it easier to keep up the fight.

Some of my optimism is natural or part of my personality I guess.  Part of it is telling myself that I can beat this thing and that maybe someday they will find a cure; in fact maybe I will be a Doctor someday and be part of that research.  Friends and family certainly help, and maybe the odd distraction (like music, or a good movie …).  For the most part I guess I am optimistic because I refuse to give up hope. I believe in staying strong.  In my opinion, keep looking beyond the day-to-day challenges and hoping tomorrow will be a bit better. Without hope, there is no way of getting through the struggle.

I also get some of my optimism from others; specifically from other patients.  Seeing what others go through makes my battle look small. These patients serve as my heroes and role models – probably because I see what they are going through and certainly can appreciate it when I compare their condition to mine. The biggest hero in my life today does not have IBD; she has Cystic Fibrosis. She has had to put university on hold while she waits for a double lung transplant. She goes in and out of the hospital for weeks at a time and never gives up hope. She is optimistic and in the face of hard times she devotes her time to other patients. What is inspiring is her ongoing optimism; someday, I wish that others would look at me and think the same thing – that good ultimately predominates over evil in the world.

Jill Plevinsky | Patient Advisory Council Chair

I was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease at age 7 and have grown up to become both personally and professionally invested in the pediatric inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) population. Through my interest in improving the lives of these patients and their families, I became involved with the C3N Project and ImproveCareNow primarily as the founding chair of the Patient Advisory Council, which serves the initiatives of both projects.

I currently live in Cambridge, MA having recently earned my M.A. in child development from Tufts University. As I continue my collaborative work with the C3N Project and ImproveCareNow, I hope to eventually earn my PhD in clinical psychology and continue research and program development efforts that will help improve the accessibility of social support and overall health-related quality of life for all patients with IBD. I have a special interest in utilizing social technologies and social media platforms to do so because my own avid use of these tools has helped me to broaden my own patient network beyond friends I had met through experiences earlier on in life through pediatric support groups and Camp Oasis.

My own experience at these support groups and the Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation of America’s Camp Oasis program initially inspired me to dedicate my higher education and career goals to young patients with IBD, and I hope that my insights and unique perspective from that of a patient and a researcher helps LOOP readers to better understand how ImproveCareNow is striving to make a difference from the top down.

When my daughters were younger, they loved The Little Mermaid, or more specifically the Disney version, with beautiful Ariel, crazy-scary Ursula and, most saliently, her two evil, ever-present eels, Flotsam and Jetsam. In Disney's tale they are menacing, conniving, willing to terrorize beautiful and sweet creatures of the sea. Our girls used to squeal and scream, grabbing my wife and me for safety whenever Flotsam and Jetsam showed up on screen.

My mother said that when I was in first grade, she knew I would be a psychologist.

I came home from school one day, excited to have my first-grade pictures!  Remember those big sheets that you had to painstakingly cut into little squares? I was proud of my pictures and couldn’t wait to pass them out.

As a young person growing up in Washington, DC in the late 60s and early 70s, I was immersed in the importance of changing the system.  My father was a lawyer and my mother a social worker.  My family placed a strong emphasis on taking responsibility for making things better.   Several years later, when I decided to go to medical school in New York City to train at Bellevue Hospital, I wanted to experience medicine in one of the country’s biggest urban public hospitals. During medical school, I also decided to join the National Health Service Corps as a way to provide service.

Fresh out of residency, I was eager to put into practice all that I had learned.  However, I wasn’t able to start my work in Corps in Rochester, New York immediately. I found a position with the Elmwood Pediatric Group while I waited for my service to begin.  After I began my service, I continued to spend parts of days and weekends at the Elmwood Group.

There was a striking difference in the environment of the private practice and the neighborhood clinic. At the clinic, appointments were scheduled twice a day in blocks, once in the morning and once in the afternoon. Mothers and children waited for hours in a cramped waiting room devoid of pictures or toys.  At the Elmwood Group, we saw many more patients, equally complicated cases, in a schedule that ran on time.  At Elmwood, I would see poor kids with asthma whose disease I could manage much more effectively than I could at the health center because it was easier to develop an effective relationship with patients in a system that ran efficiently and that communicated a sense of caring. In short, I was struck by my inability to produce the same outcomes (even though I was the same person) working in two different systems. It was simply unavoidable that my effectiveness as a clinician depended on the system in which I was working.

I also discovered that by focusing on what patients need and want, I could change the system. After I was named director of pediatrics at the clinic, I took what I learned about efficient office operations at the private practice, did some reading about queuing theory and succeeded in implementing a scheduling system that improved the experience for patients and increased the number of children for whom we cared by about 50%, with no increase in staff, while reducing the number of no-shows.  From this experience, I also learned that changing the system affected not only the patients but also the doctors caring for them. It was so much more satisfying for all the physicians to see patients in a system that ran efficiently, communicating to our patients that we respected their time.

My appreciation for the importance of the healthcare delivery system deepened when Corps transferred me to a storefront clinic the south central neighborhood of Los Angeles.  By the time I left Rochester, I had realized that I needed to have more skills than I had learned in medical school if I was going to change the system. I wasn’t hesitant to share my “big ideas” for better healthcare delivery with my partners of the Elmwood Group. One evening after work, one of them put his arm on my shoulder and said, “don’t become one of those researchers who just studies why those of us in practice don’t use evidence or don’t provide the best care for our patients. You better figure out how to be useful.”

This was a defining moment.  Over the past 20 years, I have studied and learned about how to use and apply improvement science and systems engineering to enable doctors, nurses and, now patients work together to make health care the best it can be, applying the knowledge we have today, and discovering and creating innovations that will make care better tomorrow.  That’s why I’m proud to be part of the ImproveCareNow Network.

Much in the same way ImproveCareNow gets excited for World IBD Day (May 19th) and Crohn's & Colitis Awareness Week (December 1 -7), the National Council on Skin Cancer Prevention is excited about Don't Fry Day - which is today, the Friday before Memorial Day Weekend.  A day that is set aside as time to raise awareness and hopefully prevent skin cancer.